instal the new for android How to Win Friends and Influence People

Encouraging others to talk about themselves and asking questions that they will enjoy answering is a form of flattery that few people can resist, and leaves people with the impression that you are a good conversationalist even if you haven’t said a lot yourself. He advises that to be interesting, you must be interested. Carnegie offers specific techniques, focusing for example on the power of a simple smile to make a good first impression that conveys warmth, openness and goodwill.Īn entire chapter is dedicated to the importance of remembering people’s names, with Carnegie claiming that “if you don’t do this, you are headed for trouble,” because a person’s own name is the sweetest sound they can hear.Ĭarnegie next offers advice on being a good conversationalist, with the acknowledgement that this requires being an attentive listener more than it requires being good at talking. Carnegie insists on the value of becoming genuinely interested in others and being a good listener as the first step to making someone like you. Part Two is all about the power of empathetic listening and making the other person feel important. If you can understand and acknowledge a person’s desires, you are much more likely to get them to do what you want.

Carnegie maintains that positively influencing people requires the same approach. When you go fishing, Carnegie argues, you don’t use strawberries and cream for bait just because it is your favorite food, you use what the fish eats. The final concept of Part One is that people are most motivated by what they want. Honest and sincere appreciation, he argues, is the “legal tender that all souls enjoy,” and gets results where criticism and ridicule fail. Carnegie advocates instead for understanding and appreciation to foster positivity and gain cooperation.Ĭarnegie reveals “the big secret” of dealing with people and getting people to like you: praise. Like kicking over a beehive to gather honey, criticism leads to resentment and defensiveness. Carnegie advises against criticism, which often only makes influencing people more difficult. Part One focuses on the importance of honest and sincere appreciation.

Instal the new for android How to Win Friends and Influence People